Potty training is one of the areas of parenting which feels incredibly important, and also potentially quite daunting. There’s a heap of information out there being shared online, by friends and family and by professionals. The quality of advice, and research, can vary enormously and can also become outdated quickly as new research is carried out.
What does the science say?
We approach all our research and advice from an evidence-based viewpoint here at MFFY, so you know everything we write about is backed up by science. With this in mind, we feel it’s important to say that there is still some debate in the scientific community about when and how to potty train. New studies are being done all the time, and for some aspects of potty training there is simply a lack of good-quality clinical evidence.
We have reviewed the research and evidence available and will continue to give you the most accurate and useful advice based on this. But we also constantly review and assess our articles based on new evidence – so this may not be the last you hear from us when it comes to potty training advice!
The potty training advice for parents from ERIC (the UK’s children’s bladder and bowel charity) has recently been updated based on clinical evidence and research compiled by ERIC and their partners. We feel strongly that this approach reflects good levels of research and evidence, which is why we’re sharing it with you.
Advice from bladder and bowel charities is that most children will be ready to start potty training around 18 months old.[1,2] It will be a process, though, and your toddler won’t be fully independent when going to the toilet until they’re older and have had time to practise all the skills involved.
It’s important to note that age is not everything here. If you reach 18 months, you don’t have to press a switch and go! It might be that this age comes at a time of change for your toddler, or you have other big life events happening that might make it more stressful, which mean it is probably not a good time to start potty training right then, and this is ok. ERIC’s advice says to start between 18 and 24 months; starting earlier simply gives your child more time to practise.
Getting ready for potty training – it’s a process not a moment!
You and your little one can practise the skills that are used in potty training before you even consider getting rid of nappies. This idea of exploring potties is sometimes called ‘potty learning’.
Have a potty available for them to spend time sitting on and getting used to.
They might only want to sit on it fully dressed at first, and this is fine as it is all about getting experience which will help your baby learn to balance, move on and off the potty, and maybe inspire them to want a try at using the potty for a wee or poo.
If your toddler isn’t keen on the potty, or is especially tall so finds it uncomfortable, you might want to try having them use the toilet instead. For this, you’ll want a children’s toilet seat and a step stool – the best position for using the toilet (for everyone) is to have somewhere flat and firm to rest your feet.
Try to let them experience parts of the process of using a toilet or potty, without any pressure.
This could include changing their nappy in the bathroom and flushing away poo or flushing the toilet when you’ve finished. You could offer your baby a chance to sit on the potty when you change them, if they want to, to get used to the sensations and routines.
Letting your baby have some nappy-free time after a change (to minimise the risk of accidents) will also give them a chance to explore the feeling of not wearing a nappy. It doesn’t have to be for long – find an amount of time both you and your baby are comfortable with.
You might also want to talk more than you usually would about going to the toilet – let your baby hear you say when you need a wee and then see that you go to the toilet when that feeling comes.
Encourage them to start being involved in other skills that are needed to use the potty.
Although the act of going to the toilet on the potty is the most visible skill involved in potty training, there are lots of other little things children need to be able to do confidently to make that successful.
Things like getting clothes on and off, being able to fetch and hold the right amount of toilet paper and being able to communicate their needs are all important for using the toilet.
Give your baby lots of time and opportunity to practise these skills while you’re going about your daily routine, so that when the time comes for them to use these for potty training, they can focus on the newer things they will be learning.
Talk to the other people who care for your baby about how you’d like to approach potty training.
Potty training is one of those topics that almost everyone has experience of, and so they all have an opinion on it! How we remember it from childhood, or how the people around us have potty trained their children, can have a huge impact on what people expect potty training to look like.
The guidance that many organisations (including childcare and health professionals) use to inform best practice also changes over time, as new research helps us to understand the impact of different approaches. So, what your parents, or the teachers at school, remember being told might not be the best advice anymore.
The approach of starting with potty learning for your baby, and moving to potty training around 18 months, is best practice advice based on the current research. It might be different to what the other people who look after your baby expect, so making sure you are all on the same page – and can be consistent when the time comes – is a really valuable thing to do ahead of time.
If you’d like to read more about the process of potty training, click through to read our other articles on the topic:
Can it really be time to think about a potty? Yes, and it's not as scary as it sounds!
Time for potty training? Here's the latest advice on how to manage it
Troubleshooting potty training – we answer some common questions
References:
[1] ‘Potty training: how to start & best age to potty train’ by ERIC: the children’s bowel & bladder charity (undated). Published online, available here: Potty training: how to start & best age to potty train
[2] ‘Children’s bladder and bowel issues: Some fables and facts’ by Davina Richardson (children's specialist nurse) for Bladder & Bowel UK. (2020). Published online, available here: Children's bladder and bowel issues: Some fables and facts