Why is your toddler holding a pencil so awkwardly?
You probably don’t think much about how you hold a pencil – you just pick one up and start writing. Seeing your toddler master the art of not only gripping a pencil (or crayon, pen or, horror, permanent marker!) but working out how to get it moving highlights just how tricky this process actually is. It can often look awkward or clumsy, which makes it tempting to ‘correct’ them, but when this feeling strikes try to hold yourself back!
There is a reason they are working through this stage of uncomfortable-looking grips, so it’s important for you to know why it’s happening – and how to help them in the best possible way.
As your toddler’s muscles have developed and grown stronger, they have been able to use their arms, wrists and hands in new ways, allowing them to hold pencils in new ways too.
Although it can seem as though the hand is doing all the work here, being able to hold and control a pencil requires strong muscles in the back, shoulders and arms to support that hand while it moves. This is why initially babies and toddlers grip pencils using their whole hand, and often make big sweeping gestures using their whole arm when they write and draw.
As their larger (gross motor) muscles became more reliably strong, your toddler will have been able to start concentrating more on how they use their small (fine motor) muscles in their wrist, hand and fingers to hold and move a pencil.
They can now use their fingers to help control the pencil as it moves, and the first stage of developing this skill often involves using a pencil grip known as the ‘digital pronate grip’.
This is where your toddler holds the pencil against the palm of their hand, their little finger points towards the ceiling, and their index finger is extended towards the point of the pencil. Their other fingers would be curled round the pencil to keep it upright.
This way of writing looks awkward – because it is! They will need to rely on their elbow and wrist to move the pencil across the paper, and it is often held at a very upright angle because of the position of the hand and wrist movements.
Some children will never use the digital pronate hold when writing and drawing, and others use it for a very short time, most likely because it is a bit uncomfortable and not very efficient. But if they do use it, what it is doing is allowing your toddler to explore how it feels to move a pencil with a bit more control.
It can be tempting to jump in and move their hand, to make holding the pencil look more comfortable or familiar, but try not to.
Your toddler needs to explore how holding the pencil feels to them, and what their body is telling them about the movements and sensations as they make marks on paper. This learning will help them build the muscle strength, and awareness of their movements, which will allow them to find a more comfortable pencil grip as they grow.
This isn’t to say you can’t suggest another way of holding a pencil – one of the best ways to do this is simply to sit alongside them and draw or write too. As you pick up your pencil talk about how you’re holding it and why: “I’m going to hold it like this, resting on my finger here. My little finger is nearly kissing the page!”
Your toddler might not have the muscle strength and agility to copy your hold successfully just yet, but making them aware that there are options out there (with no pressure to be using a pencil this way now) can encourage them to experiment when they feel ready.