Why focusing on now might be best for you (and your baby)

Have you ever been told you need to do something with your baby to make sure they behave in a particular way when they are older or as adults? Writer Oliver Burkeman suggests that by focusing on the future you might miss the power of the present.

Oliver Burkeman’s book, Four Thousand Weeks, is about life, not just parenting; but it can help us resist some of the pressure that often comes with being a parent.

Helping you to focus on now

As your baby grows, you might find yourself drawn into comparing what they are doing with other babies you know (or see online).

This can lead to a focus on what your baby will be doing next, and sometimes even pulls us into looking even further into the future and feeling we need to prepare our baby or toddler for the next stage of their life, instead of embracing what they are experiencing now.

In the app, you're following your baby’s unique journey, and this helps you to focus on now – you know the activities and ideas we suggest are just right for your baby.

Think about what is right for your baby now

Another helpful thing might be, rather than thinking about your parenting in terms of what this means for your baby when they are older, to think about what is right for them (and your family) now.

When you go out for a walk, this might be because you all enjoy this now – not because you are making sure your baby grows into an adult who exercises.

You might choose to limit screentime – not because you are worried about future impact, but because you think going out or playing is better for them now.

Thinking about what feels right for you and your family now is likely to be positive for both the present and the future, so can reduce stress and worry.

Oliver Burkeman (2022). Four Thousand Weeks – Time Management for Mortals.