Space – running, walking and safety

Room to run around might not always be available but having occasional access to space is necessary for your toddler’s physical development. Although space can be wonderful, it can also raise worries about your toddler's safety. Here are a few things to think about to help keep them safe. 

Life has just become that much more thrilling for them now they are beginning to run. Not only that, they are also learning how to vary their speed from a walk to a run. 

These times mightn’t always be as much fun for you though, depending on where they are running. Even though they are more able to slow down, in the heat of the moment it could feel like they never will.  

Scientists suggest that toddlers are learning about learning all the time. They see something and respond to it, regardless of their experience.^[3]  

Having the freedom to run in a large space is exhilarating – and your toddler doesn't understand risk yet,^[1] so running is simply joyful. 

While playing in a park, you might hear their giggles as they start to run. If you run after them this could feel like a game, and they think that running must be enjoyable for both of you.  

Or they might have heard or seen something that sparked their curiosity, but as they don’t yet understand risk, they run towards it. Toddlers often enjoy exploring their surroundings and when space is available, they can become even more inquisitive. 

Although it might feel scary at times, these experiences are necessary for them to understand their physical capabilities, social expectations and understanding of risk. 

If you are in a wide-open space with no dangers, it’s great to give your toddler a chance to run. 

According to research, toddlers become fairly good at setting their own boundaries and will work out a distance at which they feel safe enough to explore independently of their parents.^[2]  

In general, toddlers find it comforting to know that you are always there for them.^[1] If they are running in a large open area, they will look to check they can still see you.  

However, if you are in a built-up area, or there are lots of distractions, consider the following options for supporting your toddler’s understanding of when and where it is safe for them to run.  

Try to remain calm and resist shouting at them if they run.  

Use actions instead of your voice by moving quickly after them.  

You can move faster than they can, and if they don't think they're playing a game with you, they're more likely to stop when you hold their hand or pick them up. 

Saying one word loudly and firmly helps attract their attention.  

You might talk about this with your toddler and use a word like, “Stop,” or “Wait.” Over time, your toddler will learn that when one word is spoken firmly, they must stop. For now though, always follow them; don't rely on them to listen to you. 

There may be times when keeping your toddler safe involves pushing them along in a buggy, holding their hand, or placing them in the seat of a shopping trolley.  

Be honest with them and say they are travelling in this way because you want to keep them safe. Perhaps explain that the supermarket is particularly busy or that there are a lot of cars in the car park. Your toddler will be better able to spot dangers on their own if you can help them understand what they are.  

It might be useful to have these conversations before leaving the house so that your toddler knows what to expect. 

If they run in built-up or busy places and you must stop them, it can feel upsetting. 

It’s normal for you both to become flooded with a range of emotions. Your toddler mightn’t understand why they have been stopped and feel frustrated that they haven’t achieved what they set out to do. If your toddler becomes upset, calm and reassure them.  

These kinds of situations can also leave you feeling as if you've been through a hurricane of emotions, which can be draining both emotionally and physically. Soothing your toddler may also do wonders for you and your nerves. 

Perhaps later in the day, when emotions aren't as high, talk about what happened.  

References: 

[1] Adolph K. E. (2008) Learning to Move. Current directions in psychological science, 17(3), 213–218. 

[2] Lieberman, A.F (2017) The Emotional Life of a Toddler. Simon & Schuster, Inc. 

[3] Anderson, J.W. (1972) Attachment Behaviour Out of Doors. In Ethological studies of child behaviour, ed. N. Blurton Jones. (1972) Cambridge University Press.