Do you remember? Reminiscing and supporting your toddler’s memory development

As your toddler’s language develops, they might begin to talk about things that they remember. They might recall recent events or occasions from a little while ago – listening to your toddler’s memory of things can give a wonderful insight into what’s important to them.  

Memory – more of a story than a photo album! 

This is such an interesting area because although we think our memory of certain events is clear, our memories are malleable. That means that we might remember aspects of an event, but the details might not always be accurate, and memories might change over time.  

Memory involves three separate but linked processes: encoding (or entering information), storing and retrieving.^[1] These processes are interconnected, and link with other things, such as emotions and relationships.  

That’s not what I remember – why recollections may differ 

Some psychologists describe memory as being constructed.[2] This means your memory of an event might not be identical to your friend’s or your toddler’s memory, as the way you remember is linked to your experiences, knowledge and emotions.   

Listening to what your toddler remembers might help you see what’s important to them 

What your toddler remembers can give you an insight into how they understand the world around them, because our memories are linked to our knowledge of the world.  

You might notice they remember how they felt, or they share an aspect of an event that you had not noticed but that interested them.  

Chatting with your toddler about their experiences gives them the chance to retrieve memories, and then store them again; this might help to make the memory stronger and easier to retrieve next time. And it might slightly change what they think they remember – as what you chat about influences how the memory is stored.  

References 

[1] Baddeley, A., Eysenck, M.W., & Anderson, M.C. (2015). Memory, 2nd edn. London Psychology Press.  

[2] Goswami, U (2020) Cognitive Development and Cognitive Neuroscience: The Learning Brain, 2nd edn. London: Routledge.