From changing tone to using questioning words – how your toddler’s questioning develops
Your toddler will ask questions using intonation, facial expression and gesture at first, so before they began to talk your toddler was probably asking questions by looking or pointing.
Their first spoken questions might have started quite soon after first words as your toddler realised they could use words to ask for information or things they’d like.
The first question word your toddler is likely to use is probably, ‘What’, and they might use this with just one other word – so, ‘What that?’ which can make answering questions tricky at first.
‘Who’ and ‘Where’ questions are also likely to be ones your toddler asks quite early in their questioning journey.
These questions probably come first as they are linked with things your toddler can see around them.
Why questions will come later, as to ask, and understand the answer to, a ‘why’ question your toddler needs to be able to think about another point of view or an event they cannot see. For example, “Why is Daddy sad?” involves recognising and understanding the emotion of another person, and that this might be caused by something they can’t see or haven’t experienced.
Tips for encouraging questions
Think (and question) out loud
If you’re looking for your keys in the morning, ask, “Where are my keys? I’m sure I put them here, let’s look.”
Say the question you think your toddler is asking
If you notice your toddler looking for a favourite toy, say, “Where’s teddy gone? Shall I help you look, where’s teddy?” Or if your toddler asks you for information by looking or pointing, say, “What’s that? Oh yes, there’s a cat under that car.”
Ask questions when you want to know the answer
Keep using a mixture of comments and questions when chatting with your toddler. Try to ask questions when you’re really interested in the answer and limit questions that are testing your toddler’s knowledge, so they stay interested in your conversation.
Be interested in their questions (and if you need a break from answering, find someone else to take a turn!)
Your toddler will keep asking questions when they realise that questions help them to get more information or help with something.
Try to be interested and answer your toddler’s questions – but also don’t feel bad if, as they ask more and more, you feel you need a break. This can be where friends or relatives could help out, maybe taking a turn for a chat so you can enjoy some time without needing to answer another 'why’, ‘what’ or ‘where’!