The art of conversation – more about the skills your child needs to master to communicate

Your child is developing their social and language skills now and becoming a brilliant communicator. What do they need in order to have a conversation?  

You will notice your child is including more information when talking to other people. They are thinking about what the person already knows and what information they need to share so the other person understands them.  

Theory of mind (understanding people by attributing thoughts, feelings, ideas and knowledge to others) 

To start and continue a conversation, your child needs to think about people’s interests, knowledge and emotions. They are starting to use their understanding that not everyone has the same knowledge as them when they think about what to say to people. 

They need to notice tone of voice and body language, signs which might show their conversation partner is confused or ready to finish chatting.  

Your child will also need to think about which information to include to help their conversation partner follow what is being said.  

Conversation starters 

Your child needs to know how to start a conversation, or show they are ready to join in. 

When they were younger, they might have done this by tapping an arm or starting to talk. Now they will be learning some phrases that help them to start a conversation, as they have more experience chatting.  

Taking a turn 

Your child will need to listen to the things other people are saying and respond.  

They will be using skills they started to learn as soon as they were born when you chatted and played with them. Now they are developing theory of mind, these skills are combining to support them in having meaningful conversations.  

Ending a conversation 

Another skill, which is often quite tricky, is ending a conversation.  

This might involve noticing the other person has finished what they were going to say. Or it might be about finding a polite way to say you have finished and are ready to do something else.  

The best way to support your child to develop these skills is by having as many conversations with them as you can. When you chat with them, they will practise and develop these skills.