Beating the loneliness of parenting

Sometimes, parenting can be a lonely experience. There are often feelings of pressure, and many parents struggle to have time to focus on anything other than being a mum or dad – it’s a time-consuming job! 

Identifying times when you may feel lonely 

There are many reasons why you may feel lonely in your parenting experience. It can be a tricky world to navigate when you’re the first out of your friendship group to have children, as it can be difficult for your child-free friends to relate to what you’re going through, and vice versa. 

Parents often find that they have little time to themselves, and it can be hard to switch off. Because of being so busy, it is often the case that friendships and family relationships can grow a little distant, which in turn makes it feel harder to reach out to others.  

Ways of feeling less lonely 

Plan your time 

Being a parent is time consuming, not to mention keeping on top of your everyday life. Planning time effectively can help to give you more freedom – even if it is tricky at first.  

Little things like meal prepping and freezing food ahead of time can cut down on time spent in the kitchen; or making schedules of household jobs between you and your partner can help make sure that tasks are spread evenly, ensuring that you have pockets of time to spend together, on hobbies, seeing friends or just relaxing for half an hour! 

Build your support system 

When you haven’t spoken to friends for a while, the idea of reaching out can be daunting. Start the conversation by sending a simple message, and slowly rebuild relationships where you can. 

Everyone understands how much work being a parent is, and good friends will remember this! You could even suggest a regular time to catch up, whether that be a quick phone call, popping to each other’s homes for a cup of tea and a chat, or a meal out.  

Be honest 

When you’re feeling lonely, be honest. First of all, to yourself.  

When you feel ready, you could discuss these feelings with friends or loved ones – there are many people out there who love you, and would love to help you, but if they don’t know that there is an issue, they may think that you don’t need any help at all.  

Be kind to yourself 

When you are feeling down, it’s easy to fall into a trap of critical thoughts. If you think that you are being harsh on yourself, take a step back and look at your journey.  

Think about the wonderful things that you have done as a parent so far, and the amazing things that you and your child have achieved. And think: if you wouldn’t say it to a loved one, don’t say it to yourself!