Doing chores supports your toddler to develop social skills
Scientists agree that toddlers are eager to help others – although there is some disagreement about why.
Some researchers think the motivation to help comes from wanting to spend time with others. An alternative view is that toddlers want to help because they have a natural concern for other people, and so are motivated to do things that will meet other people’s needs.[1]
And some argue that your toddler wants to help for both these reasons – they want to build relationships, but also are concerned for other people. Perhaps they are initially motivated by wanting to spend time with others, before becoming more interested in the way helping makes other people feel.
Involving your toddler in helping and making this a time to enjoy each other’s company can help them be more caring towards others as they get older.[1]
Helping with chores can develop thinking skills
A study carried out with slightly older children in Australia, found an association between doing chores and working memory and inhibition (the ability to stop themselves doing or thinking about something).
They looked at three groups of chores – caring for themselves, the family and pets. Both self-care and family-care activities were associated with working memory and inhibition, while caring for a pet wasn’t.[2]
Although this study involved older children, it suggests that involving your toddler, in an appropriate way, with chores that have a positive impact on the people around them will support their cognitive development.
Children who help seem to be happier
Toddlers are known for wanting to be independent, but the need to do things for ourselves, and feel we can achieve tasks is something we all have, and it can motivate us to do a whole range of things. So, giving your toddler the feeling of being competent and able to make decisions for themselves is important.
Getting your toddler involved in helping with everyday tasks has also been associated with the development of confidence,[3] which, along with feeling happy to have helped someone, can link to positive wellbeing.
We know there will be times when getting your toddler to help might just make a task take too long – but why not think about the things they could do now? Some ideas from us...
Wiping a table
Getting their plate and cup
Tidying away their toys
Helping to make a snack or cook a meal
Helping to sort the washing
References:
[1] Torrens, M.G., Dreizler, K., & Kartner, J. (2021). Insight into toddlers’ motivation to help: From social participants to prosocial contributors. Infant behavior and Development, 64. Article 101603.
[2] Tepper DL, Howell TJ, Bennett PC. (2022). Executive functions and household chores: Does engagement in chores predict children's cognition? Australian Occupational Therapy Journal, 69(5):585-598.
[3] White, Elizabeth M., DeBoer, M.D., Scharf, Rebecca J. (2019). Associations Between Household Chores and Childhood Self-Competency. Journal of Developmental & Behavioral Pediatrics 40(3), 176-182.