What does research tell us about responding to your child’s food refusals?

Saying no is an important part of developing autonomy but it can be difficult for us to know how to respond to our children’s refusals – especially when they say “No” to food. We have been looking at research about children developing healthy eating habits and wanted to share some things we think might help. 

Refusal and food 

You might feel that food refusal is an area where your child can’t have autonomy because it is your role to ensure they are nourished. However, research suggests that this is an area where your child should have autonomy and you should respond to their refusals. Your child’s food refusals help them to learn to respond to their body’s signals that they are full, which is important for them to eat healthily in the future.  

Researchers suggest that the best way for children to develop control of their energy intake, so to eat appropriate amounts of food, is for parents to provide healthy food choices but for children to control how much they eat.^[1] 

Some tips for helping your child develop healthy attitudes towards food 

• Check guidance for your baby or child’s age – for example, babies under 12 months old don’t need snacks
• Avoid bribing or trying to force them to eat
• Don’t use food as a reward or treat 
• Have a pattern of three meals and two or three snacks 
• Have a time limit for meals of 30 minutes and for snacks of 20, after this time or when your baby refuses food, calmly take any uneaten food away.^[2]  

Remember you will be planning a balanced meal, so the pudding is part of that meal. If your child has had enough of the main, they might want some pudding. There is research that suggests that if we mix flavours when eating, we might eat more. Having their fruit or yoghurt partway through their main course might make your child feel hungrier and they might eat more of their meal.^[3] 

You can get more information about planning balanced meals and portion sizes on the NHS’s Start for life website (www.nhs.uk). 

References 

[1] Johnson, S.L. & Birch, L.L. (1994) Parents’ and children’s adiposity and eating style. Pediatrics, 94(5), 653-661.  

[2] Bradford Nutrition and Dietetics Service (2013). Every baby matters: Guidelines for good nutrition in Bradford and Airedale. Nutrition and 1-5 year olds.  

[3] Byrne, E., (2021) How to build a human: What science knows about childhood. London: Souvenir Press.