If you have children of varying ages, it can feel tricky to find something that everyone wants to do. When our eldest was born, we could tailor everything we did to his needs and desires, but our youngest's birth meant we had a five-year-old, a three-year-old and a newborn, and it was more of a challenge to keep everyone entertained.
I didn’t have the My First Five Years app back then, but since getting it with my youngest (who was then three), I’ve found it surprisingly easy to get everyone involved. Not all the time (it’s a brilliant app, but not a pocket-sized miracle!), but enough of the time to mean a rainy day indoors can go much more smoothly.
A really effective way to use the app with older siblings is to get them involved. One dreary day when I was feeling particularly low on energy but thought it was definitely too early in the day to turn the TV on (does anyone else have these arbitrary times, that they weirdly feel the need to stick to?), I talked to my eldest about the app and what it could do, got out my phone and showed him.
We had a look at the skills our youngest was mastering at that point. He was immediately interested and ran to find some wooden blocks.
It was then that something unexpected happened. He read the background detail aloud and then the suggested activity – this one was about how to help our youngest learn to copy simple models. There was a light bulb moment.
“Oh, I see,” my eldest son exclaimed, “so he can’t remember harder models yet. Ok, so I’ll start with just a few blocks and then see if I can add on one more.”
And with that, they were off. The three-year-old spent longer than ever before copying models that his older brother was creating for him. Both were thrilled when he managed to complete the challenge. They laughed and knocked them down together and then the game progressed into something totally different that they continued to enjoy.
My other child gradually made her way onto the rug and bigger, more complicated models were built to copy. Yes, this only lasted for 20 minutes or so, but then he asked to borrow my phone again for another idea of something they could play.
I was reminded that, just like adults, older children do not always find it easy to adapt or create play opportunities for little ones. Some do, but it isn’t a given. My boys adore each other but the eldest tends to kick the football too hard and the youngest has a habit of arriving at just the right time to destroy an almost-completed jigsaw puzzle. There is a lot of frustration and miscommunication in their play. Which is probably completely natural and to be expected – after all, they’re completely different ages.
But the app provided two things: a starting point for my eldest to understand and empathise with his little brother, and a clear idea of an appropriate game he could set up and try. He is naturally competitive so, after reading about how little children learn to catch a ball, this is something I now see them practising in the garden regularly. He enjoys the responsibility, and this helps him develop new skills as he supports and encourages his little brother.
Of course, my adult supervision is still necessary and I’m not going to be giving over full control of the app anytime soon – I get far more from using it than just the activity ideas. But allowing his older siblings to be a part of how we use it has been lovely. They often adapt the play themselves and love to take pictures to log in the scrapbook. To be honest, they probably remember to do this more often than I do!
This wasn’t something I expected to happen and has been a lovely additional benefit. So, if you’re wondering whether the app is workable when you have a bigger family, maybe including older children, I’d say that it 100% can be. And anything that encourages more opportunities for play that everyone can enjoy can only be a good thing!